Ever noticed that when you have money problems, your relationships suffer and when your relationships are in turmoil, you tend to have money problems?
It’s a pattern I see a lot in my clients, and I often joke with them when they come to me with money challenges… the root of it is nearly ALWAYS down to a relationship.
Even if you can’t think of a relationship that is going “wrong”, because it seems like you have that area of your life handled.
If you are going through any money challenges, then how’s your relationship WITH money?
Notice how money tends to flow to those who don’t even think about money – usually the ones that love what they are doing, and doing what they love.
Unfortunately, many of us haven’t ever really been TAUGHT how to create a healthy relationship with money.
Most people are taught to “hustle”, MAKE things happen, work hard, fake it till you make it…
And that might work… for a while… and then, you’re back to where you started, struggling with your finances again.
So, how can you develop a healthy relationship with money, such that it continues to flow into your life?
1) Stop beating yourself up for past “failures”
When I make “mistakes” with money, I get curious and start asking, “what’s right about this I’m not getting?”.
There is always a learning point – stop focusing on the blame, shame and guilt, and redirect your focus on what value you got out of that so-called perceived “mistake”.
When you start to shift your focus and pivot your energy, you change your relationship with money and you will be able to have more of it.
If you find that you never have enough money to do what you desire or to create ease and comfort in your life, then it’s likely that you have been focusing on the absence of it and more than likely, beating yourself up for the past “mistakes” you have made.
If that resonates with you, I would invite you to change your focus, even if it’s only as an experiment.
Do it daily, and notice how your financial reality begins to change, as if by magic!
2) Identify where your money “blind spots” are
What are you overlooking?
Do you overspend?
Do you hoard your money?
Are you AFRAID of spending?
Are you aware of what money is coming in and what is going out, or do you ignore those things and hope it’ll all work out?
These areas will be your blindspots.
Find ways to shine a light on these areas and then WORK on them.
It’s all very well reciting your positive affirmations, doing the mindset and inner work, but the fact remains that we live in a physical reality.
Therefore, there are practical things that do need to be taken care of.
What trips most people up with this step is that they may take action without first pivoting their energy, as I have suggested in the point above.
When you are taking action that isn’t aligned to you, it’s nearly always impossible to stay motivated and continue.
And if you look at it from an energetic point of view (because everything is energy and energy is everything), if you haven’t cleaned up the intention and energy from which you are functioning before you take the steps, then chances are, you are taking action from a space of fear or lack.
Therefore, any action that you take and any results that you might create from that action will always have an undercurrent of fear or lack.
For example, you might pay off your credit cards only to find a few months later, you have accumulated more debt again.
You might receive a windfall which should help you out, but then you get hit with unexpected expenses, so end up back at square one after a while.
In other words, even though you may create a shift, it’s only temporary.
If you want sustainable, lasting change, then take baby steps.
Turn the dial up on your own awareness GRADUALLY, so it isn’t overwhelming.
And then train your mind, body and energy to the elevated vibration by tending to your thoughts, beliefs and behaviours and getting them into alignment with the financial reality that you do desire.
One of the ways to do this is in a practical way is to build new daily habits that will support you with becoming more financially aware.
3) Start deepening your relationship with yourself, your worth and your own value
Start exploring what you love about you.
For most people, this may be uncomfortable to do… keep on at it until your self-worth starts to blossom.
Some of you may require a little support with this.
It’s one of the things that my clients find really hard to do, especially at the beginning.
Most people haven’t been taught how to value themselves, without relying on others to validate them or assign value.
A lot of my clients find this part of the process particularly challenging, as they are so used to seeking external validation that they don’t even realise they are doing it.
This external seeking of validation can be so subtle, and because most people have been conditioned to do this from a young age, it seems like it’s just the normal thing to do.
For example, how many of you have ever felt that they needed to make their parents happy or proud?
Have you ever found yourself studying for the next qualification, so you can be recognised as the best?
Or maybe you’ve had the experience of wanting to please others, so you often end up compromising your own needs, just to make someone else happy?
If any of these things strike a chord with you, then it’s likely you are unconsciously seeking external validation and may have some work to do in this area.
The one thing I know that helps in this particular area is when you surround yourself with supportive people, who can help you to reflect back to you your value and worth.
Avoid doing this exercise with people who will criticise and judge you.
At least, at the beginning.
When you have practised this for a while, you will see that what others think or say about you won’t affect you anymore.
4) Get super clear on what really lights you up, beyond just the money
Most people get so hung up about the money.
They tend to focus ALL their attention to what will make them the most money, or what will save them the most money.
They may be so busy thinking about all that, they forget to do the things that truly light them up.
If you’re doing things JUST for the money, it’s nearly impossible to stay motivated if you have a dip in the money… so, most people will give up and let go of the things that COULD generate them the money.
This is why it’s so important to do what you love… the reward has to be greater than JUST the money.
When you have all this down, the money will flow!
… and it may not be in the way social media or others will have you believe!
You know, the glamourised version of working on a beach, earning money while you sleep and all that.
That IS a possibility, for sure… but in my experience, it rarely shows up the way you THINK it will!
So, are you ready to change YOUR financial reality now?
If you would like my support with how to do this in a practical, pragmatic way WHILST managing your energy AND creating an intuitive way of doing it that is aligned to the way YOU are wired to create, then you’re invited to join me on my Catalyse programme.
In Catalyse, you will learn about all 4 of these key elements in a much deeper way.
You will receive support from me in the energetic and practical aspects AND be part of a supportive community.
If you have questions about Catalyse or are unsure if it’s the right fit, then apply for a no-cost Discovery Call, where I will help you to make an empowered decision to see if this is the right fit, or if there is another possibility of support that you can receive from me.